I can tell I’m getting old. I could make any number of quips about aches and pains setting in…but I believe in fitness, so I don’t really have those.
I can tell, because new people have about a minute and a half for me to decide if they’re worth my time.
“Matt, you need to be more understanding, caring, thoughtful…..”
Nope. Life is about buying and selling and time is the most precious commodity.
People who don’t make a point to know themselves and know how the things they do, rub people, will generally not make the cut. Those people usually get cut in about 30 seconds. Like, how do you not know your laugh could peel paint? Your observance of personal space is perhaps more European than it should be as a person who lives in America or your observance of personal space is too American for someone who lives in Europe. There are certain things, as an adult, you should be able to observe and deduce correctness.
Food noises. I cannot do food noises. If you are an audible eater, especially in a professional setting, nope. I can’t do you. You will not make the cut. Eating is a good thing to do with people, it brings people together, but it should still be a neat and tidy affair. Your food noises should be just that: yours.
I’m not just going to drop this on you without a solution or a take-away.
When you are in public think about a couple of things when meeting people for the first time.
1. Eye contact.
2. Firm, abrupt handshake.
3. Calm, measured tone of voice.
I could go on, but I promise, your next interaction with new or old people will be much more pleasurable if you follow those four tips.
Other things to think about when you are meeting someone for the first time, regardless of work or play:
1. Would this person take me their mother’s funeral or best friend’s wedding?
2. Would this person want to grab a beer/coffee with me if we ran into each other again?
These are two seemingly innocuous questions, but they have quite a bit of relevance.
Weddings and funerals are not events to be taken lightly. Most people wouldn’t take just anyone to their mother’s funeral. Certainly not a loud eating, hyena laughing, shifty eyed, buffoon. Same goes for weddings, although I think more leeway is afforded to wedding because they are a more cheery event. Still, unless you can/have demonstrated an ability to behave like a civilized person, you will not be invited to either of these events.
A beer or coffee. Two simple things. Two things just about everyone enjoys. To take coffee or a beer with someone shows investment. The desire to invest time, lingering over a beverage in a public place. I try to be aware enough of my presence to assure that if given the opportunity to interact with me again…beer or coffee could be in the forecast. It is for the investment, not for actual drinking.
Just some food for thought. Have an awesome day.